burn the witch.

ok so i was playing some Left 4 Dead and i threw a Molotov at a witch and it go me thinking.
why did we burn witches?

Was it out of fear?
or was it out of fun.
I am going to have to say its the latter. humans are crazy for violence. the romans are a prime example of that with gladiators. but that's another note.
but how could you tell if a witch was a witch?
Book writing’. Ability to tell the time without staring at the sun. make a sandwich with out cheese!The Devil’s Work! What do we do with witches? We burn them!
so i checked google to see if google could help me find out how to find a witch, and i ran across a video that i have long forgotten about.

So why did we stop burning witches?
extinct?
we became more civil?
just stop being fun?
I think we should start burning things again.
not witches thou, way to oppressed.
but douchebags.
like that bud light guy. god i hate him.
people who wear sweaters tied around their necks.
People who drive way to slow. im talking like 30 under in a 50 durring rush hour!
And that guy who writes David Caruso scripts.
"Horatio, looks like the doctor died from an overdose"-csi
"looks like the doctor"*puts on sunglasses*"got a taste of his own medicine"-Horatio Caine

Moving

alright. i know i have already posted today but i think i need to kill time untill my plants can be harvested in farmville. at 1230.
Ok, so i am moving out in less than 6 days, under one week. mixed emotions. because of a few stress factors. i havent even started packing yet. probs going to do it a day before or something haha i always leave shit for the last minute. another stress factor is the fact i still don't have a bed. or matress. so yeah i dont know what im going to sleep on once i get there. my boss is having a hard time finding jobs so im not going to be making money for a bit, so i need to cut down on my spending and hope i can get a job bricklaying. GAH! and i need to get a shit tonne of shots for the operation im going on in june. like hep-a and hep-b shots thats all this week. god its going to be fun!
but with all these stress factors, i stumble upon a song so relaxing that it destroys all the cares of the world. i think i have listened to it ten times now, thank you danny for posting this. it deff helped. :)
and on a side note what colour should i paint my room. im thinking a green. more to come when i actully pick a colour.
http://soundcloud.com/dj-dain/dont-worry-im-yours-mashup?page=2#play
thats the song.
here is a quote for you to end on.
"You see? You just can't trust anyone. The first girl I let into my life and she tries to eat me"-Columbus 

okokokok.

so what do you think of when some one asks you what the most badass thing in the universe.
here is some of the answers i have gotten from that.
-Chuck norris.
ok i can agree with this. he is pretty awesome. i also would have accepted MR.T or pre-pacifier Vin Diesel.
-Fucking in public.
Jesus nipples. i almost died when i got this response. i was meaning people or things like maybe a stretch armstrong or maybe a 12 sided rubix cube, thats pretty badass. but fucking in public that is pretty badass come to think of.
-Jesus Christ on a unicorn with a rocketlauncher that launches Firballs of awesome.
ok this is more like i was expecting. that would be awesome to see. like in space. facing some sort of 3 headed monster, or that really annoying budlight guy. FUCK HIM. you are not funny. you are  lame.
ps this is my answer
-Kittens covered in spikes.
i wouldnt say badass per say. but it would be painful when that cat jumps on your lap wanting to be pet. it would be like having a cactus that enjoys belly rubs, throwing up on your stuff, and secretly trying to kill you...

that photo. that is pretty badass but im pretty sure that guy got his ass runover. it was that protester from china way back when.
-Donkey kong.
thats a good one too, i honestly stealing the princess and throwing barrels and just destroying shit. to on marios side helping him out, well kinda. and being a badass cart in mariocart 64. over all that would be a pretty rad choice.

and to finish it off ill show you what is not badass at all. no its not a pic of Obama or a sandwich with out cheese but they where close 2nds

that guy. is. Fail.
makes me want to facepalm.

Undead turtles!

Lets just jump into this!
I was talking to my friends at a local establishment about how we ate alphagetti
you all know it and love it

anyways i was telling them my brother and i would have a race to see who could inhale it faster. we never knew who won because it was so close. as i was explaining it sarah states her dad eats it right out of the can. so i was like
STOP
how does he heat it up in the microwave if the can is made of METAL.
it just would not work
but then my buddy mr josh is like you have to use some sort of turtle.
ok so your holding a turtle, but what if the microwave is some how able to shoot out some sort of lazer and fuze that turtle to your hand!
i know super cool. but some how getting the turtle to fuse to your hand will give it some sort of super powers.
no no nononono not just regular superpowers.
but Grant what are regular super powers?
-strength
-speed
-healing
-wolverine claws

none of these.
nononono this turtle that is fused to your hand will shoot out smaller turtles. SNAPPING TURTLES
that will latch onto nipples and other very tender parts of your body up to but not excluding ears, nose, elbows, armpits and the groin area.

i think that would be super cool super power.
even cooler if when it transformed it gain a bandanna
orange
and i will name him micheal

Update:
here is a pic that my friend made for me.Renee (sorry i dont know how to do the e thing)

Fire.

This post is going to be about fire and why i dislike being on fire or burnt.
Reasons:
1. The smell is awful!
2. Not a big fan of blisters.
3. Also not a fan of being charcoal
4. You can't play with children when on fire!
5. Being on fire will make you a nudist if you dont act quickly.
6. Not being called a firecrotch.
7. The lack of that burning sensation you get.
i would come up with more but that's all i can think of right now.

SO
anyways got a new job, i torch tar onto flat roofs, i enjoy it but i dont enjoy my shoes catching on fire, which has happened a few times. once it even burnt right to my sock. and don't even get me started on the lack of arm hair i have now, that was fun. guess ill post the pic of my glove tomorrow or sometime soon really.
later